Psst, also check out our list of the best car movies! Did you hear about the driver who lost his left arm and leg in a terrible racing accident? It was mentioned in the bible! Kyle Busch was looking to find a woman so Dale Earnhardt Jr decided to help him out. What is a cars preferred mobile phone brand?No-Kia. Whats the difference between a presidential election and a nascar race? What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?A Holly Davidson! How do motor sporting fans impersonate race cars? Ion-a new speedster! A: Their personalities. They're both filled with white trash. On the track, you mean it. The police were called to a NASCAR event when belligerent fans became violent after being asked to remove the Confederate flags they had brought to the event. What do you get when dinosaur drivers crash their cars? 51. Car Accident He slips off a Icy bridge, hits his head, and falls into an icy river. That car salesman is a real car-deal-ologist. A short while later she left and the "Lowe's" Racer ordered another drink . Neeeeoooww! So, jokes about car racing wouldn't actually go far without mentioning the drivers, right? Thus, you can definitely expect a mild amount of genteel mockery addressed to those behind the wheel, too. Just a little bit of friendly fun and nothing more. Their prices are just too shocking. Jeff Gordon is visiting a school. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Jeff Burton went to work for the telephone company so he could finally get on the pole. With fan events such as seasonal tailgate parties, camping, the Daytona FanZone, the Formula 1 and NASCAR Fan Fest, motorsport has some of the most loyal and passionate sports fans in the world. The nascar driver can actually finish a race. Braving the Elements with the Avatar at NYCC 2021! Why didn't the two Alfa Romeo owners say hi to each other when they met at the bar?Because they saw each other at the mechanic's earlier that day. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. 62. I guess you could say things Escaladed quickly. 30. Authorities believe it to be race-related. 54. Lmao. Imagine a nascar fan. Jimmie Johnson's ( @JimmieJohnson) tweet from 1:25pm EDT on Tuesday, September 27th, 2022: @Alex_Bowman @WorldofOutlaws @allyracing I understand that, without my agreement, @Alex_Bowman has put out a Tweet this afternoon that I am driving for him next year. Small Town WebLook at f1 for example (maybe not good comparison cause of the amount of open space) but lets say the they get a puncture and spew a bunch of tyre carcas on the track, they dont Non Athletic Sports Centered Around Rednecks, What professional sport would be more fun to watch if the athletes drank alcohol during? A racist. But I hate NASCAR, What did Michael Jackson have in common with a second-place NASCAR driver? A Sprint Cup race is on a TV. 8. I really need to get my car fixed.What body shop do you wreck-amend? Sum of All Mears 10. Why are racecar drivers the best people to go to for dating advice?Theyre trained to look for red flags. ._3K2ydhts9_ES4s9UpcXqBi{display:block;padding:0 16px;width:100%} The first incident saw Cassill get into the side of Patrick's car as he was making a pass on her early in the race. See more ideas about car humor, racing quotes, dirt track racing. Sorry if it happens to be a repost.). So the turns are all right all right all right. 2019 included two separate NASCAR April Fools Day jokes. Q: What do you call Michael Waltrip racing with his car tied to the back of Jeff Gordons? They drove up to the farm, Kyle got out and knocked on the front door and was let in. 49. Icy Bridge 31. What do Nascar and a Kinkos dumpster have in common? At first, the Focus wanted to Bolt, but after a while a Spark formed. Who is there? Legendary talk show host Jay Leno is an avid car collector and that is a fact few can dispute. Don't worry; the funny jokes about cars won't be targeting you or your driving skills *wink wink*. "Ever since my wife found them in my glove compartment." Over one hundred thousand NASCAR fans enjoyed a race on a typical oval track in Richmond, Virginia, on Which word has 6 letters, starts with an N and ends with an R and is related to a Race Why does Hitler hate Nascar? This must be a sign from God." Q: Do race drivers stop and take a nap? You can change your preferences. Did you hear NASCAR and Formula One were trying to make an Ultimate Showdown race but it got cancelled due to controversy? We are joking, obviously. Bobby says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the hell is a "pinata?" They usually stay quiet after that, lol. If somebody sees me singing in my car, my reaction is to stare at them until its awkward for both of us. There are two types of people in this world, those who drive and those who exploit those 85-2987. Violeta has completed her higher education at Northumbria University with a bachelor's degree in Media & Journalism (so you better believe she's checking her facts). Knock, knock! Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) A: Caution Flag Yellow What do we want? A Tradegy He's a racist. but I hear it's popular in some circles. Top Nav. He carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk. What do the motorsport drivers say during arguments? 4 car, is celebrating dad jokes like never before. A: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who If India ever hosted Nascar Found it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkKKMI9laIU, Im a sim racer, and I had a few skeptic friends come over and try to run a practice lap on iRacing, Cup cars at Dover. Well, as I said to another comment: if they can make fun of our sport, it's only right for us to do the same to theirs. Whats the difference between a Fiat and a golf ball?You can drive a golf ball more than 200 yards. Who is there? Apparently NASCAR fans didnt want to mix the races. Then it clicked. Jimmie Johnson goes into a bar still dressed in his race suit and ordered a drink. The Gran Purr-ismo. Q: What Does Dale Earnhardt And Pink Floyd Have In Common? Q: What do Matt Kenseth fans use for Birth Control? So, if you are into the roaring, rumbling, scraping, or screeching, someone who can't pipe down when it comes to autos, or just someone who doesn't mind a funny joke about cars, you are in for a greasy treat. A: They Both Blow Rods. Why are stories about Nascars so satisfying? Anyhows, it doesn't matter if you are driving a Model S, a 1990 Dodge Charger, or your partner mad, funny car jokes will surely tickle one's pickle, whichever the case is. 53. Remember that curb you hit when parking? Please check link and try again. "Oh Nissan!". My girlfriend told me my love making reminds her of Earnhardt Jr. Because everytime I do good I find away to wreck it before I finish! What is a Tesla Model 3s favorite dance?The Electric Slide. Apparently he hasnt passed anything for almost 2 years! A Mechanic is standing outside the garage as Roger Penske is coming in to check out the new Taurus, and can't help but notice that Mr. Penske has a Dog under each arm. 26. The salesman comes around and says: "Can't understand how it could possibly be the case, the new sedan is so much quieter". Imagine a nascar fan. Al Unser Jr calls the police, and says, "They stole my dashboard, they stole my steering wheel, they stole my brake pedal, Hell, they even stole my gas pedal" Just imagine how unfair it would be for a horse in NASCAR. VIDEO: Annoyed rugby player deals with troublesome drunkard in morning traffic, Victor Osimhen: Nigerian striker nominated for Serie A Player of the Month award, Chelsea defender gives gives interesting reason Potter is a great manager, Video: How Al Batin defender's spectacular goal line clearance denied Ronaldo sublime solo goal, Glazer cloud hangs over improving Man Utd, Which is the richest football club in the world in 2023? And her husband. What is the main difference between BMWs and Porcupines?Porcupines carry their pricks on the outside. Hilarious Nascar Jokes That Will Make You Laugh - YellowJokes 23 Hilarious Nascar Puns - Punstoppable Nascar Puns Whats the favorite band of NASCAR drivers? I'm not a fan of NASCAR Working at a Land Rover factory is so interesting. We need to stop mixing races. Illegal drag racing or street racing can become as dangerous or even more dangerous than a Nascar pileup. Who can drive all their customers away and still make money?Taxi drivers. You can read more about it and change your preferences. "Can I give you a lift? Why did the washing machine schedule a test drive?Because he wanted to go for a spin. Whats the difference between politicians and nascar drivers? Changing Clothes "Will this help?" What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Although dad jokes are told with the most genuine humorous intention, they are often unamusing except to the 'dad'. ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), "He's A Douchebag": 50 People Share What Schoolmates-Turned-Celebrities Were Like Before Fame, 30 Informative And Fun Food Charts For Anyone Trying To Eat Smarter, 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, Guy Puts In His "Notice Of Immediate Resignation" After Boss Disregards Their Verbal Agreement, Warns Others To Always Write Things Down, AITA? It always takes a left turn. This Fathers Day, Busch Beer, as part of its sponsorship of Kevin Harvick and his No. Finally a turn in the right direction. My Subaru accidentally skidded over the bridge.I guess its now a Scuba-ru. Was the cord too long?" A list of the best female race car drivers of all time. What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill? But on a serious note, don't be a douche, chip in on that petrol, the liquid gold is expensive these days. It reminds him that he never got to finish a race. What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill?A miracle. Husband: Honey, the neighbor is washing the car with his son again!, Wife: Poor kid! If you wanna go offroading, take a Land Rover.If you wanna get back, take a Land Cruiser. NASCAR is one of the most popular car sports. Bobby jumps and bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the Jeff notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. What do Nascar and a Kinko's dumpster have in common? The Champ looks at Dale Earnhardt Jr and says, "When he comes to, tell him that's 'Crowbar from Lowe's'." Just imagine how unfair it would be for a horse in NASCAR. Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. 64. What did the traffic light say to the car? Jeff Gordon is out taking a stroll in the snow. Yeah. That way they can **BOTH** watch NASCAR. "Well, what are these perverts doing here by the road?" The goals are the size of a school bus. 20. When Kyle came out, Jeff was confused about why he had been in there so long. Q: What Does NASCAR Stand For? A: At Any NASCAR Event. Thats definetely a way to take care of them. Why do chicken coops have 2 doors?If they had four they'd be chicken sedans. Here's another miracle. Why do Swiss drivers have the least number of Formula 1 victories? Things ended up getting X rated, so I thought it better to just LEAF them alone. A: Their personalities. Labonte Hunter 9. Porsche will sell electric sports car specifically for environmentally conscious owners experiencing a midlife crisis. The biggest irony is being hit by a Dodge. A: They Both Blow Rods Setup Size: 8.9 GB. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. Gordon beams. A: On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside! Why does Matthew McConaughey only watch NASCAR in a mirror? A list of the best female race car drivers of all time. because no-one else would be able to ketchup. The Mechanic waves and says, "Welcome back, Roger, Nice dogs, sir." 52. The voice of the Devil was heard: "Rusty, YOU HAVE SINNED!!! Three kids see it happen. ", As soon as the vehicle rolled into the pitstop, the jack said? Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? The third kid says, "I'd like a electric twin-turbo wheelchair with a HiFi stereo and Cruise Control." Get spokes people to talk about the sport instead of real drivers of a stock car like the days of Richard Petty. A couple sat down next to him and asked, "Are you a real NASCAR driver?" Please enter your email to complete registration. A: Half the cars in Sundays Race. Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my What is the longest-running event? Gordon asked. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. A: He starts out with "I once heard Tony Stewart say" 38. "What a joke he is." Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks. "Now that you mention it," he replied, "she also needs a bra and panties." Theyre both filled with white trash. By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition. Christ said "I do not speak of my own Accord". What do you call a guy who always loses his car? My girlfriend told me my love making reminds her of Earnhardt Jr. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Lamborghini once decided to ditch the ICE entirely and focus on electric cars for foreseeable future. He is wearing a bra and a lace garter belt. Dale Earnhardt Jr He sits down and asks how Dale Earnhardt Jr is doing. the sales girl queried as she wrapped the gloves. I just got nine out of 10 on my drivers test. What does NASCAR stand for? 42. Have I given you the tour of my estate yet? The nascar driver can actually finish a race. A Ford Focus Electric and a Kia Soul went on a date. None - they took the wheels off their homes years ago. A man walks into a bar with his dog. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? Your account is not active. What do you call fans who love Formula 1 and hate NASCAR? 24. A: Hollywood is calling and wants him to co-star in a sequel to "Speed Racer" Matt Kenseth and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. "God must have meant that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days." NASCAR. #18 Bobby Labonte Interstate Batteries Grand Prix. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} "Her hands are just slightly smaller that yours." Whats the difference between Hitler and a Nascar driver? After discovering it's just a human traffic ring. 29. The abundance of fresh air, sunshine and our beaches attract NASCAR fans Q: What dont drivers eat before a big race? My 35-year boycott of Ferrari and Lamborghini is still going strong!And will continue until they lower the price. Did you hear about the Yoga class for electric cars? I-Renato gas for my vehicle! 14. If you enjoy it, don't let others try and take it away from you. That doesnt sound so bad. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. . Why does Matthew McConaughey only watch NASCAR in a mirror? If a tire can go on the wrong side, it will. 21. If I owned a DeLorean, I would probably only drive it from time to time. And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?" Why couldnt the frog find where he parked his car? NASCAR isnt always just about the race. Matthew McConaughey just bought NASCAR And hes making racers drive the opposite direction. Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? Knocks the daylights out of Little Busch, leaving him out cold! Q: How can you tell when Mark Martin is going to say something intelligent? A: Come and join me! No, thats a thing? because no-one else would be able to ketchup. They tap you on the shoulder and ask, "Are we watching the qualifying?". did alot for the race. 23. What does NASCAR stand for? Q: Why Do Rednecks Only Drive On A Racetrack? What do you call a speedster made of French bread? A: Banging On The Lid Of The Casket Trying To Get Out What professional sport would be more fun to watch if the athletes drank alcohol during? Politicians should be required to dress like NASCAR drivers. Web1. No matter how hard I try I still cant outrun a Nascar. Cars theyre a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. Q: What Does Brittany Spears And Dale Earnhardt Jr Have In Common? 13. Have you heard about the Nascar driver thats in the KKK? (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. 58. 5. What did the little Nissan truck say to the big Nissan truck? 2.Girls leaving club. Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving. Rowdy Busch says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtcbsi8itHw&list=LLrPkYCJo4QblpFvOh9bq3Vw&index=339. Whats the difference between NASCAR and the NBA? 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Hes a racist. Why did the tomato driver lose against the lettuce? Have I given you the tour of my estate yet?It is a Vauxhall. With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy's truck leaves him too. The last guy was able to get out of the way. Here are the corniest dad jokes to celebrate. They're all racists. A: Yeah, when they are getting tired. ", Why are snail speedsters painted with a big 'S' on the hood? What did the tornado say to the car?Want to go for a spin? And Matt Kenseth said, "and look at this. What is a Tesla Model 3s favorite dance? A: When he taps you on the shoulder and asks Are we watching qualifying?, 15. There's an old saying in NASCAR racing ''Lauda.'' Bad news: Your car is totaled.Good news: After the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie. Reel quick, 1. What does NASCAR really stand for? What is a six letter race that starts with a N and ends with a R Nascar. "Oh, yes," he answers. 5.Going in circles. They take the next left. What should you double check when buying an electric car?That your driving license is current. NASCAR is officially canceled After discovering its just a human traffic ring. 4. Although racing requires ultimate seriousness and focus from all motorsport team members, including drivers, humour adds more flavour to the game. Someone complimented me on my driving the other day.They left a note on the windscreen - Parking Fine! WebBemorepanda collected some funny memes about NASCAR. 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